Light up your spot lights, strap on your heels and take your gowns of the hangar! Tonight the Eurovision Song Contest 2016 begins and eighteen acts from the five corners of the continent will fight it out for ten qualifying spots for Saturday night’s Grand Final. To help you keep pace with the race, and track of all of the racers, we’ve put together a guide to all tonight’s action. For each song we have excerpts from the Wiwi Jury 2016 and where they ranked in our poll for Semi Final 1. Who do you think will cross that finish line? Let us know in the comments below!

Semi-Final 1: Jury Final Review

SONG 1: Finland: Sandhja with “Sing It Away”

Memorable lyrics: “When fear will try to make you cave in, remember love is the source”

The Wiwi Jury good: “It puts a smile upon my face and that’s important.” (Cristian)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “I don’t find any redeeming qualities in Sandhja’s voice.” (Bogdan)

SONG 2: Greece: Argo with “Utopian Land”

Memorable lyric: “I get up in the morning and I meet the guys we are on fire, off we head for the Utopian Land.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “Their 2016 entry is enjoyably bleak, with an (ironically?) upbeat chorus that contrasts with the darker verses. It’s an unusual entry, but it has so much more to offer than the shouty lady ballad of 2015.” (Robyn)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “The male vocals come in and I’m dead. The chit-chatty sound isn’t inspiring and when the female vocals re-enter they start to grate. If this is utopia, then order me a big old chunk of dystopia asap.” (William)

SONG 3: Moldova: Lidia Isac with “Falling Stars”

Memorable lyrics: “I try to speak, make a sound the dark surronds me when you’re gone.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “As she demonstrated on Romania’s national final, when she’s on form, she can deliver it confidently when it comes to live performances.” (Anthony)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “The song needs a power diva to lift it beyond being a generic dance track, but Moldova isn’t delivering.” (Robyn)

SONG 4: Hungary: Freddie with “Pioneer”

Memorable lyrics: “Be proud, you were born to be real oh-oh.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “LOVE! This is simply perfect. He has the unique voice, the look and the song. I was so proud when he won A Dal and I really hope that he will qualify and reach the good place he deserves.” (Judit)

The Wiwi Jury bad: If there’s an entry that needs a revamp, this is the one! “Pioneer” is poor on enunciation, and somewhat haphazard in direction. (Deban)

SONG 5: Croatia: Nina Kraljic with “Lighthouse”

Memorable lyrics: In devastating times, I keep this hope of mine, even in the darkest times.

The Wiwi Jury good: “This is the song that could lift Croatia back to their late ’90s heights, then maybe even more. It’s an incredibly accessible song whilst also sounding native to Nina’s own style. Unlike some Eurovision winners, it feels genuine.” (Chris)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “Just as actual lighthouses are becoming outdated, the track sounds like a relic from a bygone era… or at least a reject from Iceland’s national final.” (Padraig)

SONG 6: Netherlands: Douwe Bob with “Slow Down”

Memorable lyrics: “Every morning hits so hard. Guess I’m running scared guess I’m running on empty.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “This sounds like the winner to me. It’s very evident that Douwe Bob is a true artist, and “Slow Down” is timeless.” (Ed)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “Not even a master vocalist can give this flat-as-a-pancake track enough dynamism to pique — let alone keep — my interest.” (William)

SONG 7: Armenia: Iveta Mukuchyan with “LoveWave”

Memorable lyrics: “The ground in motion set off all sirens, you took over my heartbeat, beat, beat, beat.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “I adore it. It’s special and Iveta has the perfect voice for the song. The ‘woohooo’ part gets stuck in your head and it won’t get out.” (Denise)

The Wiwi Jury bad: ““LoveWave” is essentially a mediocre pop number underscored with clever instrumentation and effective visuals.” (Deban)

SONG 8: San Marino: Serhat with “I Didn’t Know”

Memorable lyrics: “I want to sleep upon your skin.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “Serhat gets points for originality and utter balls.” (Bogdan)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “I didn’t know there would be an entry from San Marino that I liked worse than last year’s “Chain of Lights”, and yet, I was wrong.” (Diego)

SONG 9: Russia: Sergey Lazarev with “You Are the Only One”

Memorable lyrics: “Thinking of making a showdown when love is found, thinking of waiting till you’re around.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “It feels like Sergey and his team have been preparing since 2008 to bring Eurovision back to mother Russia.” (Mike)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “I had very high expectations for this song, which weren’t quite met.” (Robyn)

SONG 10: Czech Republic: Gabriela Guncikova with “I Stand”

Memorable lyrics: “I have felt the strain, I’ve made mistakes, with the monsters in my head.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “The Czech Republic has decided to send a song that is not only beautiful but also shows the flawlessness of the artist’s voice.” (Marek)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “‘I Stand’ is dirge camouflaged in visual technicolour.” (Deban)

SONG 11: Cyprus: Minus One with “Alter Ego”

Memorable lyrics: “I knew it all along, but I couldn’t tell, this kind of love, would lock my heart in jail.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “Last year, when Minus One came second in the Cypriot finals, I was in awe because of them. Now I’ve passed the awe and moved straight into hotdamn! This is by far, my absolute favourite this year. A solid rock number with immensely catchy chorus and bulletproof vocals.” (Kristin)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “I find it a little flat and a little dated.” (Max)

SONG 12: Austria: Zoë with “Loin d’ici”

Memorable lyrics: “Even if the road seams to be a dead end, if you go for it, I follow”

The Wiwi Jury good: “Zoë possesses a voice from heaven and the organic instrumentation elevates the song to a higher ground.” (Ed)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “Her song is dated, boring and in French.” (Patrick)

SONG 13: Estonia: Jüri Pootsmann with “Play”

Memorable lyrics: “We ain’t got all night, to find out what is right, so let’s go undecided till we know.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “Dreamy-pop veiled with silky sex — totes j’adore! Pootsmann’s voice penetrates the soul and the song smoulders with clever production values.” (Deban)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “As a spawn of Slytherin he’s borderline at best.” (Padraig)

SONG 14: Azerbaijan: Samra with “Miracle”

Memorable lyrics: “You rebuilt this castle, based on lies, and we have hit the point of no return.”

The Wiwi Jury good: ““Miracle” is a perfect pop song, with a catchy hook.” (Sami)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “This is just a typical Swedish pop song. It struggles to reach G:son level, but of course fails.” (George)

SONG 15: Montenegro: Highway with “Real Thing”

Memorable lyrics: Inside you, take me a little closer, inside you.

The Wiwi Jury good: “Of the two eclectic rock entries, Montenegro is by far the strongest.” (Padraig)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “To listen to this is a draining experience which I would wish upon no one, including my worst enemies.” (Liam)

SONG 16: Iceland: Greta Salóme with “Hear Them Calling”

Memorable lyrics: “See the shadows dancing, oh they dance for us tonight.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “By the time this reaches Stockholm, be ready to witness how a singing shadow called Greta Salóme steals the show.” (Luis)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “I find Greta’s song slightly dated, because I used to listen to Icelandic bandOf Monsters And Men‘s similar kind of songs back in 2012.” (Bogdan)

SONG 17: Bosnia & Herzegovina: Dalal & Deen with “Ljubav je”

Memorable lyrics: “I’ve been dying for your body, you make me feel alive.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “Oh, that marvellous sound of cello, and the epicness of the drums. The melody of “Ljubav je” is amazing.” (Mikhail)

The Wiwi Jury bad: ““Ljubav je” is just tedious. For three minutes we’re taken on a tour of Bosnia & Herzegovina’s greatest “hits” at Eurovision without anything new being brought to the table.” (Angus)

SONG 18: Malta: Ira Losco with “Walk on Water”

Memorable lyrics: “I’m not perfect, but I’m A-OK.”

The Wiwi Jury good: “Walk on Water” has power, modern style, rhythm and the ability to work wonders on stage.” (Patrick)

The Wiwi Jury bad: “It’s a decent song. I want to put it in my playlist, but for some reason I haven’t done it yet and I am not in a hurry to do that.” (Mikhail)

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Gayane
Gayane
7 years ago

Iveta Mukuchyan,Go Armenia!!!!

NL
NL
7 years ago

8/10 acts in this semi are 100% qualifiers but there still 5 countries for the last 2 spots

Erin
Erin
7 years ago

Countries returning after a a one or more year absence usually get higher marks than average, so I suspect Croatia and Bosnia&Herzegovina to sail through. I wouldn’t completely rule out the strength of the Turkish and Greek diaspora when it relates to voting for San Marino and Greece: The first one is so bad that it could potentially get a cult following and the latter addresses the refugee crisis in an aloof/escapist manner that could resonate with enough folks that I wouldn’t be surprised if Cyprus ends up paying for that influx of votes, although it truly deserves to qualify.… Read more »

Ern
Ern
7 years ago

Certain Qualifiers:
Hungary, Armenia, Russia, Czech Republic, Iceland and Malta.

Likely Qualifiers (but very overrated):
Cyprus, Croatia and Azerbaijan

50/50:
Greece, The Netherlands, Bosnia

Certain NOT to Qualify:
Finland, Moldova, San Marino, Austria, Montenegro and Estonia

Holden
Holden
7 years ago

Armenia 12 points
The Netherlands 10 points
Estonia 8 points
Czech Republic 7 points
Malta 6 points
Austria 5 points
Hungary 4 points
Russia 3 points
Azerbaijan 2 points
Iceland 1 point
Good luck to all entries tonight !!!

Lady Gaga
Lady Gaga
7 years ago

Wonder how many juries & votes will Azerbaijan buy this time? Those vocals are awful – it needs a miracle to reach those notes. This song needs a big-throated vocalist. For the others (mostly), it’s just fine, no one really stood out. It’s like a blur. Maybe the televised versions are better looking

Pollaski
Pollaski
7 years ago

So if the Czechs finally qualify, the EBU’s gonna be a total dick and wait til last to announce them, right?

esc 2016
esc 2016
7 years ago

I want Greece in….and of course I will vote for Greece!!!
Nice chorus, vocals, type of music….everything are perfect

Mark Pumphrey
Mark Pumphrey
7 years ago

1. Croatia
2. Estonia
3. Armenia
4. Russia
5. Azerbaijan
6. Malta
7. Iceland
8. Hungary
9. Cyprus
10. Netherlands
11. Austria
12. Czech Republic
13. Bosnia & Herzegovina
14. Greece
15. Finland
16. Moldova
17. San Marino
18. Montenegro

Hajrudin
Hajrudin
7 years ago

Croatia song is so boring and they have dresses who are win Barbara Dex award.
Vote for better song from Bosnia. And on eurosong.hr one vistior wrote last day that Croatia juries gave 0 point to Bosnia, and that 12 points from Bosnia juries is go to Croatia.

mocosuburbian
mocosuburbian
7 years ago

“Be proud, you were born to be real oh-oh”
how inspiring and original hungary must win /s

Reminder
Reminder
7 years ago

Video of Russia tv performance for jury is deleted on Youtube. How order that EBU or someone else.

Laburnum
Laburnum
7 years ago

“…and in French.”
So what you’re saying is if you’re gonna sing, it has to be in your own language with the exception of English. Seriously? Zoe is doing the right thing I think, French makes the song even more pretty and puts diversity into the contest. But oh, you are a boring little person, making it hard for you to understand that this is a change for once.

MTD
MTD
7 years ago

Videos with the performances of France, Sweden, Spain and Russia are already on YouTube.

Russia is such a let down despite all that screen thing. Just not entertaining to watch. Full blown stupidity with 0 story behind him. Yup.

France has somehow of an empty stage behind him, but overall it’s less annoying that his Russian colleague.

AMIR FOR THE WIN!

Colin
Colin
7 years ago

My final list before seeing the actual show: 1. Estonia 2. Czech Republic 3. Croatia 4. Iceland 5. Netherlands 6. Austria 7. Hungary 8. Malta 9. Moldova 10. Russia ———————— 11. Cyprus 12. Azerbaijan 13. Armenia 14. Greece 15. Finland 16. San Marino 17. Bosnia & Herzegovina 18. Montenegro Combined with my actual expectations, I know Armenia and probably Azerbaijan too will pass. I give slight chances to Bosnia and Greece as well. I am afraid my favorite, Estonia, might not pass, but I am confidant he will. Same with Nina. I hope the best songs will actually pass. Top… Read more »

MTD
MTD
7 years ago

Videos with the performances of France, Sweden, Spain and Russia are already on YouTube.

Russia is such a let down despite all that screen thing. Just not entertaining to watch. Full blown stupidity with 0 story behind him.

France has somehow of an empty stage behind him, but overall it’s less annoying that his Russian colleague.

AMIR FOR THE WIN!

CookyMonzta
CookyMonzta
7 years ago

I will be at work when this show is broadcast live. I hope Eurovision, as usual, holds the recorded broadcast so that I can watch (and grade) the performances at midnight (NYC time). I will shield myself from anything that reveals the results before then.

Pollaski
Pollaski
7 years ago

Anyone else getting these “Error Connecting to Database” messages?

What gives, wiwibloggs?

martyn
martyn
7 years ago
ESCArgy
ESCArgy
7 years ago

I can’t wait to watch the performances and learn who the qualifiers are!

BZB
BZB
7 years ago

Croatia song sound very similar with song Uncover sing by Zara Larsson from Sweden.

Pollaski
Pollaski
7 years ago

Is there going to be an official “gamethread” for the semifinal?

jeanette
jeanette
7 years ago

GABRIELA GUNCIKOVA is a fabulous angel..PURE DEEP!!!
The strongest voice in live performance !
You do not need insert priority to crazy show behind if your priority is voice!
“BEAUTY IN SIMPLICITY”
…just PURE powerfull singing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shay
Shay
7 years ago

Almost all of the memorable lyrics mentioned were not the memorable lyrics.