Wiwi live blogged the first Eurovision Semi-Final on May 12. Below is the transcript. Come back to watch Wiwi blog the second semi-final on Thursday, May 14 at 8pm London time (that’s 10pm for all of you in Romania and Turkey.)
Tuesday, May 12
7:20pm Hello Europe! London calling. Wiwi is so nervous. I just took a Vitamin C pill. I need to boost my immune system, what with all the Eurovision stress!
7:22pm Wiwi has his water, some painkillers, a coffee and a semi-final scorecard–let’s do it!
7:26pm Remember: only countries with contestants singing tonight will be able to vote (along with the UK and Germany). This bodes well for Romania–Romania always gets votes from Portugal and Israel + they will get votes from Balkan countries with that song Balkan Girls. Fingers crossed for you, Elena!
7:49pm Wiwi also has his fingers crossed for Malta and Turkey, but we know they don’t need it! Chiara, we know this is your first Eurovision without your father. We’re thinking of you!
7:53pm Wiwi is joined by his Finnish sidekick Vebooboo tonight. He’s sending a shoutout to his Balkan Girls!
7:59pm One minute away! My palms are sweating. I’m going to need a new keyboard.
8pm Montenegro has the unlucky fortune of going first. Shame. It’s a good song. Wiwi and Vebooboo worry she will be forgotten. Her dancer is gorgeous. Look out for him.
8pm: It’s already 11pm in Moscow. I hope no one falls asleep on stage.
8pm: Dobry vecher Moscow!
There’s a seriously bizarre opening number before Montenegro even comes on stage. “Good day magic horse.” What is this? Totally don’t get how this opening segment on comets is related to Eurovision.
8:03pm: Okay, Europe officially beats the US in the race to the cultural bottom.
804pm: Here are the hosts. She’s leggy. He is short. Great teeth. And she’s named Natasha. How Russian.
The gorgeous Croatian dancer has taken off his jacket. Can we vote for him?!?!
Um, Andrea just straddled said dancer.
8:11pm: Competent performance from Montenegro. Male dancer had no body hair. 12 points for that!
8:11pm: Czech Republic says ‘Hate me or Love me.’ I choose the former! Seriously, I think the gypsy caravan blew up. This is so weird. Don’t get it.
8:14pm: Belgium is up. You can’t vote for your own country, so most of their votes will go to Turkey’s Belgian-born Hadise
8:16pm: Could not tell if those backup singers were drag queens or just big women
8:19pm: Belarus with “Eyes That Never Lie.” “I was going insane when you came into my life.” That makes two of us. This is horrible.
8:21pm: Vebooboo just realized Belarus is singing English. It’s tough to know. It’s real tough.
8:22pm: Sweden with “La Voix.” This lady sweat a lot during rehearsal. Watch her forehead.
Long opening note sounds like it belongs in an airline commercial.
8:24pm When she sings low it sounds like she smokes. A lot.
But whoa. Can she hit the high notes! Her eyes look like they are going to pop out. That was amazing (voice, not eyes!). GREAT staging.
8:26pm: Inga and Anush from Armenia. Sister Act.
Sexy Arabian beats. Wiwi feels like he should be naked on a camel.
Intermission + BBC interview: Jade Ewen said Inga and Anush out-do her in bling.
8:32pm: Susanne Gheorgi from Andorra. Lots of short white skirts and guitars. “You’ve got to get a life..that’s what you say to me..but I’d rather die if you’re not in it with me.” Girl, you need a counselor pronto. This is totally Hillary Duff meets Avril Lavigne. But they sell records….Also, why are you smiling while you say these lyrics?Â It’s a depressing song for real.
8:35pm: Light rock from Switzerland’s Lovebugs.
“Will you catch me when I fall?” he says. The jury might. This is a great song, but not very Eurovision. There’s nothing hooch and I don’t feel like I’m in a disco/brothel
Vebooboo thinks he had a cold. His voice was a bit rough. But it worked.
8:39pm: HADISE: If this doesn’t help Turkey get in the EU, I don’t know what will.
No, Hadise. You’re my gift from heaven. This is fantastic. But why is that one backup dancer in green? Everyone else is in pink. She just winked in the camera. Work!
Nearly naked man on stage. Now it’s picking up. A great finish. OK, you’re through to the final boo. You’re through.
8:43pm: Israel on stage. Palestinian and Israeli singer. Nice message. Will this get votes for promoting peace?
OK, Wiwi never thought that peace could sound so bad. Shame!
OK, this song is as long as the Israel-Palestine conflict. It and this song need to end.
8:47pm: Cover your ears. Bulgaria‘s song is so bad! Cats are about to die.
“It feels so wrong.” Oh yes. Yes it does.
There is a nearly naked man on stilts. And that’s the highlight of the act. If you were betting on who would finish last, Wiwi has your candidate…
The set looked like a rainbow vomited.
8:52pm: Iceland. Yohanna with Is it True? She’s beautiful. And I love the blue glittery eye shadow. A welcome change of pace.
But seriously, these clouds look like they’re straight out of a Scientology recruitment video.
The male backup dancer was Iceland’s representative last year with “It’s My Life.”
She’s channeling Nashville, not Reykjavik. . .That was amazing. She didn’t need spandex or glitter or sequins. She had a voice.
8:56pm: Macedonia‘s song is surprisingly good! This will steal votes from Bosnia.
8:58pm: Next is Elena from Romania. Wiwi and Vebooboo are hemorrhaging (spelling?). Basically our nerves are bleeding out of us. We have money on her!!
This is so catchy. I love the forest. I’m rubbing a pic of Nadia Comenici for good luck.
BEAUTIFUL! THE COLORS ARE BEAUTIFUL! her hips are ready to blow, this record is so hot and she has so much to show. i can’t believe she is the daughter of a priest
This is a traditional Romanian dance. The holding hands bit.
She sounds nervous. Showing vulnerability is GOOD. LOVE THIS.
That was seriously the best all-around performance of the night. The staging, the singing, the dancing. Amazing.
903pm: Waldo’s People from Finland. This staging is meant to represent homelessness. 90s discotheque. Very catchy. Fire twirling and firm abs. Hot all around.
OK, Wiwi does not see homelessness. There are some burning trash cans but that is more of a street riot theme.
9:11pm: Is the cameraman is drinking vodka?? The camera work is horrible. The cameraman missed some of Romania’s moves–and they are doing it again with Portugal.
9:12pm: Get ready to be blown away. CHIARA is on stage! MALTA!
Beautiful dress. She’s working her curves and she looks fresh. A few cracks in her voice…she has been singing too much this week.
She’s back on form. This is good. She’s feeling it. Watch that head shake!
A few pitch problems tonight, but Wiwi bets she is still a contender to win tonight’s segment.
9:16pm: Bosnia is up. Great outfits. Victorian rockers.
Again, the cameraman is messing this up.
Fan-generated wind. Very California Beach Body.
That was great, but it’s not as moving as Malta, Iceland or Romania.
OK, all done with the performances. BBC is about to have an interview with Sakis Rouvas of Greece and Alexander Rybak. Will report what they say.
Fifteen minutes to vote, Europe! Do what’s right: Romania, Turkey, or Malta! Okay, or Iceland. Her voice is killer.
9:27pm: Did Malta just wash her hair? It still looks wet. But she looks amazing nonetheless. That gown is gorgeous. Wiwi loves rhinestones.
9:30pm: Ick. Back to the annoying Russian hosts. Apparently we can crash at Natasha’s place. WhAtEveR
9:38pm: Thanks for your ongoing comments, guys. A special hello to “bogdan.” We have the same taste : )
BBC is interviewing Jade Ewen. Apparently her Eurovision tour of Europe was the first time she had left the UK. She’s very humble and excited about this. She just revealed that she thinks Maltese guys are hot. Maybe a move to Valletta is in store? She also loved Poland. The most surreal experience was Amsterdam. “They were all singing along to the song,” she says.
9:40pm: BBC interviewing Denmark. Rowan Keating co-write his song. Rowan keating is irish. Hence, Denmark will get Irish votes on Thursday.
9:42pm: Ukraine’s Svetlana Lobodoa says Greece, Norway, UK and Spain are big competition.
BBC interviewing Norway and Greece. Sakis called AlexanderÂ ‘Alexander the Great.’
Sakis smiling, but I detect nerves..especially next to Alex.
Alexander’s birthday is tomorrow! 23 years young. Looks about 12. Like the Chinese gymnasts. Is he lying? Should he be at Junior Eurovision?
9:44pm: LOL. T.a.t.U is performing. Oh, Mother Russia.
9:49pm: And here are the results. . .
Wiwi is going to faint.
(1) TURKEY. My heart is going DUm Tek Tek. Well deserved.
(2) SWEDEN. No surprise there. She looks relieved!
(3) ISRAEL. Politically correct = a winner. At Eurovision? Crazy. I think this was the jury vote
(4) PORTUGAL. Whoa. (Where is Romania? Where is Malta?!?)
(5) MALTA. YES. Chiara looks so happy. Fantastic. She looks moved. Love her.
(6) FINLAND. Okay. Where is Romania???
(7) BOSNIA. Three left.
(8) ROMANIA!! THERE IS A LOT OF NOISE COMING FROM TRANSYLVANIA! CONGRATS ELENA! SHE LOOKS SO HAPPY!
My heart is still going Dum Tek Tek. I am shaking.
(9) ARMENIA! Sister Act advances…
One more. Has to be iceland. Please.ICELAND!!!!!
(10) YES, IT IS ICELAND! SHE IS CRYING. Such relief. For Yohanna and Europe.
MORE TONIGHT. Getting on subway. xoxo Wiwi
1) Clean sweep for Scandinavia. All three advance. They really do have the world’s best producers.
2) Jade Ewen said she is worried about Iceland since she also has a ballad. Throw in Malta and the ballads will seriously take votes from one another in the final
3) Turkey did OK, but Wiwi knows she’ll do better in the final.
4) Romania was even better than Wiwi had hoped. The colors and the costumes are really well-done.
5) You guys correctly predicted 9 out of the 9 semi-finalists on Wiwi’s ongoing Eurovision poll. That 10th spot was decided by the jury. Wiwi thinks it was Israel since they didn’t make the top 9 of Wiwi’s poll. Anyway, goodnight! Catch up with you guys tomorrow.