After seven days of non-stop partying at Eurovision, Meows and Vebooboo were exhausted and sad as they waited for their planes at Baku’s international airport. Fortunately the following celebrity meltdown helped perk us up.
San Marino’s Valentina Monetta—a.k.a. cyber sex girl—struts over to an espresso stand where a line of weary travelers are waiting for a much-needed caffeine fix. The vendor tells Val that she’ll need to pay 10 manat, or around 10 euros, for a coffee. That’s kind of exorbitant. Most people would just walk away. Not Valentina. Uh-oh-uh-oh-oh. Wearing a bright pink top, pink scarf and pink framed shades, she transforms into a 5-foot tall ball of fury. She waves her hands in the air and deploys some rather aggressive English: “I cannot believe this! Ten manat?” She storms off looking absolutely furious and complains to her entourage. But like a crack addict drawn to a drug den, she returns to the same kiosk and purchases a 2 manat Twix. Her parting words? “F – – – YOU!” She comes back minutes later to interrogate a man on how much he paid for his drink. At this point Meows and Vebooboo are dying. But it gets better. When she returns to her seat in the waiting area, she pulls out an electronic cigarette that mimics smoking.
Unfortunately we don’t have any video footage of the incident: Meows was not ready for a fight with this little pink diva! Uh-oh, uh-oh, no! But we did manage to snap Valentina sulking behind Vebooboo. As you can see, he was barely able to contain his bemusement.
For the record, we’d like to add that this incident only makes us love Valentina even more. We were constantly ripped off in Azerbaijan—by cab drivers who got “lost,” and by salespeople who added zeroes to our food bill. We love that she looked a vendor in the eye and said “enough is enough!” Well, she didn’t really say that, but “f-you” is pretty darn close, especially for someone using English as a second or third language. Twelve points to San Marino!