Tonight Melodifestivalen voters decided to send Robin Stjernberg through to the final with his song “You”. That’s fine. Less acceptable was their vote to let Anton Ewald accompany him. We really wish we could give Sweden an andra chansen to set things right.

I’m seriously deflated by tonight’s result and have lost all faith in Swedes. They clearly voted for Anton because he is pretty and not because he could (a) sing or (b) had a good song. Here’s how we called the night.

Our SVT stream cut off during Robin Stjernberg’s “You” and we weren’t exactly upset. His khaki suit was very 98 Degrees (that band Jessica Simpson married into before divorcing out of). Cheesy lyrics, rather boring song, all delivered by a wannabe pop star. But given the lackluster field this evening, we still give him our vote of confidence!

Eric Gadd’s song means “We’ll Never Lose” and surely he can’t lose to Robin Stjernberg. This silver fox won me over with his voice and simple staging. He’s not trying to be a pop star. He’s just trying to do his thing.

Caroline af Ugglas ran down the runway in pink platforms, reminding us that she’s a bit of a quack. But that’s why we love her. Her song was seriously emotional so she didn’t need any on-stage support. It was just her and a black background and her that soulful voice. Loved it. More questionable were the chains she was wearing, and the massive gold sequined tummy accessory. What was that?

Behring Miri is a refined and more intelligent version of Sean Banan. He kept his song focused on the words, not on over-the-top gimmicks. It’s totally feel good, and I don’t mind all those plagiarsm allegations. Just because he uses the word “allez” does not mean he is copying Jessy Matador!

Next up was “Hello Goodbye” sung by a tiny man named Erik and his more attractive counterpart Tone. She appeared to be wearing a table cloth. At some point he sang “now we’re over, it’s all over” and I couldn’t help but agree. Sweet song but completely forgettable.

Okay, the rest of the acts all run together. All I can remember is that all votes for Anton Ewald should actually go to his back-up vocalists. Martin Rolinski borrowed Lena’s back-up dancers (the ones wearing full-body condoms), and Cookies N Beans still didn’t burn any flags on stage despiting singing a song called “Burning Flags”.

After the first round we ranked the artists as follows:

1. Behring Miri
2. Caroline af Ugglas
3. Eric Gadd
4. Robin Stjernberg
5. Erik & Tone
6. Cookies N Beans
7. Anton Ewald
8. Martin Rolinski

Sadly Sweden did not agree. After the first vote three acts were eliminated. Eric Gadd finished last. Cookies N Beans came seventh. Caroline af Ugglas came sixth.

So then there was a second period of voting and we had our first dual, which was between Behring Miri (“Jalla Dansa Sawa”) and Anton Ewald (“Begging”)—a.k.a., a dual between a good song and a crap song.

After they performed and while the votes were tallied, we learned about the next dual. It was Robin Stjernberg (“You”) vs. Martin Rolinski (“In and Out of Love”) That means that Erik & Tone finished fifth with “Hello and Goodbye”.

I can’t even bring myself to write about the duals. But as you can see both dueling duos made friends, and it looks like the two winners got rul, rul close…

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Mark
Mark
8 years ago

The lyrics of Hello Goodbye is “now we’re SOBER, it’s all over” not “now we’re over, it’s all over”

Kiki
Kiki
8 years ago

I hate to be down on Sweden but what a bland evening. I was so bored I didn’t stick around for the voting!