They’re back for Sweden, and this time there’ll be no love, love, love.

After the recent debut of Ladies of Soul and the duet between Sirusho and Sakis, we at WiwiBloggs thought it’d be fun to throw out a few ideas for our dream collabs and supergroups at Eurovision:

Babushki Humperdinck

Engelbert had gotten the Russian grannies hot under the collar - the old smoothie!
Engelbert got the Russian grannies hot under the collar – the old smoothie!

In a bid to show they’re still young and possess all their hips, Buranovskiye Babushki and Engelbert Humperdinck could enter as a sign of Anglo-Russian friendship, and with a mash-up of their songs could enter ‘Party Will Set You Free’ and then sweep the board with the stripped back strings of Engelbert’s songs and the Babushki’s fun and home-baking. Proving you don’t have to be a whipper snapper to do well at Eurovision.

Baku Babes

The Baku Babes pack some serious fire-power!
The Baku Babes pack some serious fire-power!

Never have four more fearsome femme fatales been seen on a Eurovision stage. Enter Azerbaijan’s Sabina Babayeva, Nikki, Safura and Aysel – the fiercest femmes in the whole land of fire. They’re the complete girlband – Sabina AKA Blow ‘Em Away Baku (because let’s face it she has a killer vocal), Nikki AKA Button It Baku (because every girl band has a gorgeous one who can’t sing), Safura AKA Batshit Baku (nobody wants to be on the receiving end of Safura if she’s been given a cat-walk and her man smells of lipstick) and Aysel AKA Brainy Baku (because books are always on her mind y’all and always in her heart).

A-D

They're back for Sweden, and this time there'll be no love, love, love.
They’re back for Sweden, and this time there’ll be no love, love, love.

Unfortunately for Agnes and Darin they couldn’t find anyone else to join them to create ADDA, but who cares because together they’re an unbeatable collab waiting to happen. Both are contemporary Swedish stars and survivors of Mel-Fest, and both know how to pull off dance the classy way instead of relying on heaps of synths and overproduction.

http://youtu.be/NmL6IG3QjRI

Euro Club-6

Accusations that Moje 3 have outshone the surviving members of Blue in Euro Club-6 are unverified.
Accusations that Moje 3 have outshone the surviving members of Blue in Euro Club-6 are unverified.

Blue struggled with being pitchy in Düsseldorf, Moje 3 struggled with being shrill in Malmö – combine them together and their vocal disaster days would be long gone. Blue’s lower vocal range will cut out the shrillness, and Moje 3’s pitch perfectness would gloss over Blue’s flaws. Of course they’d have to lose someone to return to the Eurovision stage, but the loss of Anthony Costa wouldn’t be too much for any of us to swallow now would it?

The Magic Flute

The members of the Magic Flute could not be sure whether they were allies or enemies on stage.

No-one can dispute how impressive the pop-opera-singing of Malena Ernman and Cezár Ouatu was on the ESC stage, but if they pinched Emmelie’s flute guy they’d have the perfect simplistic classical collab waiting to happen. Better yet they could hijack the name of a classic opera for an added touch of class – not that these two vocal gymnasts need it.

The Balkan Girls

They always start their weekend's with gin tonic and limes.
They always start their weekend’s with gin tonic and limes.

Elena Gheorge, Paula Selling and Elena Ionescu are some of Bucharest’s brightest, so it’s only sensible the ladies should get down together to form the biggest girlband rival to Baku Babes on the horizon. They could also add a little Latin flavour to the girlband rivalry, and turn up the Latin flare on the girls from the land of fire.
http://youtu.be/pagDyTSlazY

 

2012

Kurt did not get the memo about making himself comfortable.
Kurt did not get the memo about making himself comfortable.

With such a crowded market of girlband’s and female collabs, the boys of 2012: Kurt Calleja, Roman Lob and Tooji thought they’d combine for survival. Kurt brings the fun, Roman brings the vocal and Tooji brings…his very, very flexible hips and considerable makeup team. Together they should be enough to go toe-to-toe with the ladies.

Olympus

If it was all Greek to you before, it won't be after Olympus are done with you.
If it was all Greek to you before, it won’t be after Olympus are done with you.

Hera have mercy on you, if you’ve scorned the mighty Hellenic Republic: from Greece comes their greatest Eurovision team ever assembled. Their mission: get Greece back into Eurovision. Together: Sakis Rouvas, Helena Paparizou, Kalomira, Giorgos Alkaios and Loukas Giorkas join forces to get Greece into Eurovision, money or no money. Combining their blend of traditional voices, white trousers, Greek dancing and Eurodance you’ll have to fight them off from getting through the door. OPA!

The Big 5

The Big 5 represent a spectrum from the Contestant.
The Big 5 represent a spectrum from the Contestant.

 Lulu, Raphael Gualazzi, Natasha St. Pier, Julio Iglesias and Lena Meyer-Landrut. Legends one and all, and rightly so. Together they all reference high-points for the Big 5 Countries and represent the sporadic talent all 5 can display in the right circumstances on the Eurovision stage. They’re mission: convince Europe not to give up hope on the Big 5 in the Contest.

Les Revenants

After falling alone, these plucky contestants decided there was safety in numbers.
After falling alone, these plucky contestants decided there was safety in numbers.

The 2000s were not kind to the Low Countries in terms of qualifications, but banding together how can they fail? Iris, Hind, Patrick Ouchène and Nuno Resende are ready to prove Europe wrong and show that they can make it to Saturday night.

What do y’all think? Do any of our fantasy groups have a bright future or have we missed a collab that’s just waiting to happen – comments below y’all!

Angus Quinn contributed this report from the U.K. You can follow him on Twitter at @Angus_Quinn17. Then like our Facebook page to keep up-to-date with all the latest news and gossip.

20 Comments
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Iwantsalmon
Iwantsalmon
9 years ago

You guys are hilarious! I would love to see all of them happen. The Moje 3 combination made me spit out my drink in laughter! I would also like to see the girl bands and popera combination!

Alexandru
Alexandru
10 years ago

Romanian (not balkanik) girls “they always start their weekend’s with gin tonic and limes” that was really funny :))
We love Elena Gheorghe / Elena Ionescu (Mandinga) / Paula Seling!

Charles
Charles
10 years ago

@Melissa Kutcher: I strongly support your suggestion but .. the problem is that those nul-pointers are to way ahead in time from the minds and tastes of current Eurovision fans and doing that research will bore many to death as there were no Dana Internationals or Conchita Sausages agitating things back in those years. Except maybe for Jemini since belongs to the televoting era … If there were other nul-pointers in the last ten years I swear I can’t name them considering their most likely “awesome musicality” lol

Melissa Kutcher
Melissa Kutcher
10 years ago

How about the Nul pointers! Combine the high kicks of Jahn Taigen, the superhero image of Romani.cz, the rainy lilt of Thomas Forstner, and Jemini, you have a supergroup that only a mother can love!

Zolan
Zolan
10 years ago

@Z24: Yes. Oh, yes. The perfect Sopho Storm.

@Chris: Ditto. Darin for a bit doing his stuff, then Agnes for a bit doing her stuff, and with an emphatic separation between performances. Not an interval act. Not even trying to interest anyone but existing fans.

Zach
Zach
10 years ago

I would love to see a Malena Ernman collaboration. I love Popera.

Charles
Charles
10 years ago

@Chris: Their interval act could have been rubbish …. that does not mean that they are as artists rubbish. Nonetheless Agnes presented her 2 finest songs IMO. Actually from being there and reading people’s feedback about the contest in Malmö, very few people liked it so this sort of opinion does not surprise me. What’s next? Sarah Dawn Finer is a fat pig singing an ABBA song? Is still everybody thinking that Petra was seriously telling Linda Martin was a drag queen? Adelaide Ferreira for Portugal in 1985 was also called a drag queen … but back then a certain… Read more »

Chris
10 years ago

I have a small secret – and I don’t mind tell you. I thought that the Agnes and Darin interval was utter rubbish and a waste of time. Why didn’t they write a song for them to sing together as opposed to their individual songs? It seemed like the “Crap! Someone dropped out of the interval, let’s have these kids rehashing something of the past”

Charles
Charles
10 years ago

@Padraig Jude: 3 questions: Who the hell are you? What is Jedward? And what is Xfactor? If you provide me decent answers then who knows I might follow your lead of bothering myself to comment on opinions one just shouldn’t care for but apparently one feels upset by them … when in fact one should know better. That was not your case I hope, don’t want to leave scars in your musical taste whatever that is. 🙂 And by the way .. Agnes and Darin are YES the only thing In this whole debacle of bad music combined into spice… Read more »

Zack
Zack
10 years ago

I vote for LANGUAGE BUSTERS!

Unknown
Unknown
10 years ago

Rona Nishliu, Malena Ernman, Krassimir Avramov and Cezar could form the ultimate vocal band: ”The Glassiators” (Glass+Gladiator)

Z24
Z24
10 years ago

And after two more female Georgian entries, we can hope for a Sopho only group.

Alex
Alex
10 years ago

LMAO you guys are hilarious. Babushki Humperdinck has to happen. I also like Batshit Babe and The Magic Flute.

You should also consider:
1. Pirates of the Sea and Kati Wolf = Wolves+1 of the Sea
2. Evelina Sasenko, Surpriz, Les Fatals Picards and Sofi Marinova = Language Busters (to destroy as many languages as possible in one performance)

Melissa J
10 years ago

I have always dreamed of a duet between Eric Saade and Getter Jaani….for some reason….

Chris
10 years ago

There was a rumour a while back that Carola was going to record a duet with Lordi. I never thought it would happen, but interesting to see.

It may also be interesting to see a collection of joke entrants together – Dustin the Turkey, Rodolfo Chikilicuatre and Laka for example.

Padraig Muldoon
Admin
10 years ago

@Charles I completely get why you don’t like any of these. Of course they all seem crap in comparison to the epic Jedward supergroups we saw recently. The one with Ylvis and Bucks Fizz was the best but I understand if you prefer the X Factor one better. But give them a chance, you can still ? Jedward and appreciate the rest. Would you be happier if Darin & Agnes let Jedward join up with them and then they could be JEDA? Wouldn’t it be Jepic?

Jaz
Jaz
10 years ago

The Agnes/Darin interval act nearly killed me (with its awesomeness) so I can’t imagine what a collab would do. But PLEASE GOD LET ME FIND OUT!!!!!

I think Cezar and Krassimir Avramov could form a duo called The Glassbreakers…it wouldn’t be a pleasant listening experience, but you get that at Eurovision sometimes.

beccaboo1212
10 years ago

Les Revenants is awesome! They can EASILY represent Belgium in Copenhagen! They should write a song called “Follow Your Passion”! 😀

Zolan
Zolan
10 years ago

This looks like fun. Cake Will Set You Free.
(From a musical viewpoint though, grouping by similarity is not the best approach.)

Maybe someone can find a good group for “Nu Go Slavia” (6 competing countries).

Charles
Charles
10 years ago

I am still trying to find out the purpose behind these collabs … but nonetheless … Agnes and Darin would sound awesome … the Olympus crap is .. crap … Having Safura sing alongside Sabina is like asking Rihanna to sing with a … true singer … Tooji with Roman? WTF … Í won’t comment on the rest or I’ll be shut one of these days.