Eurovision fans in France are busy deciding whether they should back Destan, Joanna, or Twin Twin for Eurovision 2014. To help them make up their minds the Wiwi Jury—our in-house panel of musical unprofessionals—is reviewing each of the songs.

So this morning we headed to Paris to review Destan’s song “Sans toi”. Did this boy band charm us into taking down our One Direction posters? Or were we left hoping Eurovision will be sans Destan? Read on to find out…

Wiwi: Beauty fades, but a bad voice is forever. The people behind Destan should have thought about that dual reality before bringing together Kilian, Quentin and Dean. They cannot sing. You only need to watch their live performance on Les chansons d’abord to know that. And you only need to look into Anggun and Amaury Vassili’s faces to see the horror Destan stirs in accomplished musicians. As for the song, it’s gooey and overly sentinmental. That’s fine for a boy band. But this offering somehow feels empty—even with all that sugar.

Score: 2/10

Angus: Destan are cute but I’m not getting on board with their Franglais approach to the contest. It did Anggun no favours and if anything I think I’d have been more intrigued if it was all in French. ‘Sans Toi’ is the least entertaining song of the three on offer here. It lacks the drama of Joanna and the craziness of Twin Twin. It’s a textbook boyband song and I am so not entertained.

Score: 2/10

Deban: Sometime last year, One Direction were rumoured to be representing the United Kingdom. Despite the false alarm, no one could deny the universal appeal of choosing such an act. Similarly, if France selects Destan as its choice for Copenhagen, it’d be a wise move. Each band member comes with his own distinct voice and look. Furthermore, singing in Franglais widens the voting bloc. This is definitely a contender.

Score: 6/10

Katie: I don’t think I’ve heard anything more cringey. It’s worse than a Westlife tribute band. It would be the most forgettable and atmosphere-crushing song in Copenhagen, I don’t even want to think about it. Despite the members of Destan all being pretty good singers, the transition between French and English is so clumsy it makes the song even more awful than it was to begin with.

Score: 2/10

Zach: This entry is just one big fat NO for me. First of all, boy bands have never been a very reliable source of points at Eurovision: D’Nash for Spain in 2007 tanked, No Name for Serbia and Montenegro in 2005 got 7th but back then it was all televote. I won’t deny they’ll get the young girl vote most likely, but that’s as far as I can go. Juries would decimate this entry, and honestly pretty faces can’t guarantee a good televote score either. The song is just plain BAD. Forget boy band. This is actually boy band karaoke wannabe stuff. The Franglais isn’t cohesive at all, the singing isn’t good, and overall I’m just really put off. I pray France doesn’t fall for the “Oh One Direction is popular so they’ll be too!” trick….

Score: 1/10

Screen shot 2014-02-05 at 21.17.18Anthony: Sending a boy band to the Eurovision Song Contest has so far produced mixed results. It didn’t quite work out for Spain’s D’NASH in 2007. On the other hand, Blue almost got the United Kingdom into the top 10 in 2011. Most boy bands nowadays will have the chemistry. But I’m unconvinced about Destan and whether they’d be able to produce that spark to make an impact in Copenhagen this year.

Score: 5/10

Padraig: This is a case of death by committee, if ever I saw one. I can just imagine how the selection meeting must have went – “Oh, everybody loves One Direction” “Let’s send a French version” “Ok, but the juries don’t like anything too upbeat” “Right a ballad it is” “But what about all those silly people who don’t speak French?” “Ah sure, we’ll add a bit of English” “Sorted!” The result is definitive proof that by trying to please everyone you’ll please no one.

Score: 4/10

Sami: Comparing them to One Direction should be a crime: One Direction is so much better. I’m a huge fan of many boybands, but Destan isn’t one of them. The song is okay, but oh my gosh, their live performance was just terrible. The song really needs more power, because now it just sounds lame. If it wins, they really need to work on their vocals and make the song more memorable. Even, I think they have smallest chance to win.

Score: 5/10

Ramadan: God-awful song. Generic, dull, boy band song heard a million times before. This is one of the worst National Final songs I’ve heard in a while! I don’t think this will do well in Eurovision if it wins in France.

Score: 1/10

Wiwi Jury Verdict: 3.1/10

1. Twin Twin – 6.78
2. Joanna – 6.56
3. Destan – 3.10

Keep up-to-date with the latest Eurovision news and gossip by following the team on Twitter @wiwibloggs and by liking our Facebook page

21 Comments
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Digi
Digi
8 years ago

Preferably, France send Destan. If Twin-Twin performance win it they will go down when the contest takes place at the stage. For Joanna, It’s okey too.

Emma
Emma
8 years ago

Haha. Harsh reviews, which I understand. But…I really like this. I like it the way I liked Love Kills last year, the first live performance with the screechy key change and terrible vocals. It’s a mildly catchy song, sung kind of pitifully. Half a trainwreck. I guess I’m in the minority in hoping it goes through…

eurana
eurana
8 years ago

France: Joanna (17-20), TwinTwin (20-26) for me null point. Destan (10-15)

Z24
Z24
8 years ago

The voices in the studio version are also grating and cringeworthy. Not a good sign.

D
D
8 years ago

Ugh this song makes me want to murder something. It’s just so irritating and they can’t sing at all. Don’t know why people are supporting them to be honest. But then again, the other two choices aren’t the strongest either.

Alex
Alex
8 years ago

These reviews are a bit harsh. Yes, the live vocals were a problem, but really mostly for one vocalist in particular. He might’ve been having a bad night just like Roberto Bellarosa did in the national Belgian selection. And the song isn’t that bad – the melody is strong, while the lyrics are admittedly all over the place.

Jade
Jade
8 years ago

Twin Twin!!!! Oh Yeah!!!!!

Destan is middle for me. Joanna is much worse. Destan are pleasant enough but I really think France should opt for Twin Twin. Even if it fails, at least they stand out

I hate that countries are sending acts with no personality over those with individuality

Arianna
8 years ago

Destan’s song is nice, but meeeeeh, gets a bit plain fast. And they aren’t the strongest singers yet. Sounds like something I’d hear on an easy listening station.

Tony
Tony
8 years ago

They were the worst out of the 3 candidates in the presentation show

jumper
jumper
8 years ago

Dear france, can you resend Amaury, Anggun, or Amandine, with better song and better stage presentation?

bav
bav
8 years ago

Ok, maybe Destan is not outstanding but sturdy, unlike Twin Twin (massacre).

fikri
fikri
8 years ago

wow 3 out of 10? y’all too harsh on these pretty boys.

but yeah, the song sucks.

bav
bav
8 years ago

Music/art can not be messy.

bav
bav
8 years ago

Have you heard Twin Twin? You change your mind when you listen. This is one of the biggest crap I’ve ever heard. This is not funny, this is stupid. They will go to hell.

bav
bav
8 years ago

For me the difference is huge. Destan can be in top 5 in Copenhagen, Twin Twin under 20. place.

bav
bav
8 years ago

Francois
Teenage girls are right.

bav
bav
8 years ago

Your analysis is very weak, shallow. Destan – Sans Toi is very elegant, smart option for Eurovision in Copenhagen. While Twin Twin has no value. I can’t look and listen this. This is nightmare.

Clara K
Clara K
8 years ago

TWIN TWIN FOR FRANCE!!!!

bav
bav
8 years ago

For me very good copy of One Direction. 7/10

Francois
Francois
8 years ago

I hope my country does not select Destan. I know teenage girls love them, but this is so cliche.

dhani
8 years ago

they suck