It’s time for Wiwi Jury — our in-house panel of musical unprofessionals — to review the last four acts who aim to represent the Republic of Moldova at Eurovision in 2016. The small country’s national selection O melodie pentru Europa is never boring and always manages to take Eurofans by surprise, so it’s anyone’s game. Well, almost anyone’s. Read on to see who of this lot has a fighting chance…
21. Vitalie Todirascu — “Belladonna”
William: I’m pretty sure this guy was alive when Lys Assia won the very first Eurovision in 1956. His sound mixes jazz with opera and reminds me of the crap they play in advertisements for cheap pasta sauce. This is rambling, forgettable, but also pretty hilarious. If he isn’t taking the piss, then please take him to see a career counsellor immediately.
Score: 1/10
Mikhail: A short reminder — we are in 2016, not 1950. He is singing some kind of street tango, which is supposed to spread love, but where is the love in this? His voice makes my ears bleed and I am in a huge hurry to turn this off.
Score: 0.5/10
Antranig: We lost “Tare” — the best song in Moldova — and it got replaced by this. Boring is an understatement. I played the video, decided to switch tabs 20 seconds later and forgot it was playing before the song even finished. There’s a reason this didn’t initially make the cut.
Score: 0.5/10
Edd: This is a fun song – and Italian ethno is something we’ve never seen at Eurovision, certainly not in my time. However, it’s more a genuine folk song than a pop song with folk elements, and I’m afraid I’m not big enough a fan of the genre to dig this. It needs production to lift it.
Score: 5/10
Anthony: After missing out on the semi-finals last year, Vitalie Todirascu will be pleased he’s finally been given his chance. Sadly, I’m not his biggest fan and it doesn’t take a genius to work out why. He sounds like a cruise ship crooner at Benidorm, not as a singer a Eurovision national selection show in Moldova. And a word of warning, those high notes he’ll belt out several times becomes excruciatingly painful.
Score: 0.5/10
In the Moldovan Wiwi Jury we have 14 Jurors, but only space for 5 reviews. The remaining scores are below:
Bogdan: 2/10
Deban: 2/10
Denise: 1.5/10
Cristian: 0/10
Patrick: 0/10
Bernardo: 0.5/10
Kristin: 5/10
Robyn: 5/10
Luis: 0/10
The highest and lowest scores are removed before calculating the final score. We have dropped a low of 0 and a high of 5.
WIWI JURY SCORE: 1.54
22. Priza – “Rewind”
William: Throughout this song I have the distinct impression he is in pain and needs to use the toilet. He certainly has the passion, but unfortunately he doesn’t have the voice or the song. He associates anger with artistry, and ends up sounding like a rabid goat. I struggle to get past the 90-second mark with this one…
Score: 1/10
Mikhail: I wanted to press stop the first time I heard his voice, but I gave him a chance… Why? Whayayayay? I should’ve stopped. Then his voice got even worse. And the song itself is awfully boring and irritating.
Score: 0/10
Antranig: After listening to “Rewind”, all I want to do is rewind the last three minutes of my life and do something better with it. The positives are that he connects with the song very well and it certainly gets better as it goes on but that’s not enough to save it from being very weak.
Score: 4/10
Edd: Whilst I’m usually not a fan of rock nor ballads, I find this enjoyable. It actually has a very emotional melody and the song builds perfectly from chorus to chorus. He has an interesting voice – a bizarre mix of very feminine and very masculine. His only issue is the poor English — and I don’t think the song would work better in Romanian.
Score: 8.5/10
Anthony: Yawn. It’s a case of been there, done that and somehow got the T-shirt. This is another example of a participant going for something relatively simple and subtle, but simply fizzling out in the end. Priza’s lead singer certainly put a lot of emotion into their live audition, but his gravelly vocals might not be the best option for an already underwhelming entry.
Score: 4/10
In the Moldovan Wiwi Jury we have 14 Jurors, but only space for 5 reviews. The remaining scores are below:
Bogdan: 4.5/10
Deban: 5.5/10
Denise: 4/10
Cristian: 8/10
Patrick: 2/10
Bernardo: 4/10
Kristin: 8/10
Robyn: 3.5/10
Luis: 3/10
The highest and lowest scores are removed before calculating the final score. We have dropped a low of 0 and a high of 8.5.
WIWI JURY SCORE: 4.29
23. Beatrice – “Saved My Heart For You”
William: She saved her heart for you, but apparently she’s already given away her voice — lady is tone deaf on a good day. To make matters worse the melody is lacklustre and the lyrics overly sentimental. Thankfully her enunciation is so bad I can’t always make the words out. If this is one of the Top 24 submissions, I’d really hate to hear the bottom 24.
Score: 1.5/10
Mikhail: Boring ballad with a boring and annoying voice… You’ve saved your heart for me, but I’m not taking it! Leave it for some hearing impaired person, who will be able to bear with your singing.
Score: 1.5/10
Antranig: At first I thought she was wearing an apron on stage. Aside from a questionable wardrobe choice, I love Beatrice’s voice — it is mesmerising and soothing. Until we get to the horrible key change that is — after that she sounds like she’s having an argument with a blender. “Saved My Heart For You” has some really good components but overall it lacks something special.
Score: 6.5/10
Edd: Just another one of those painful ballads. She’s trying to act all serious, singing about her deepest emotions, but when sung in a language that is barely English, it just sounds like a parody. If a hammered Dina Garipova had to come up with a Eurovision entry in five minutes, this would be the result.
Score: 1/10
Anthony: A charmingly sweet pop ballad that gradually builds up elegantly from the start, and it’s even got a key change thrown in for good measure. It’s not the worst song from this year’s competition, but Beatrice has left me a little heartbroken. She’s done enough at her audition to make it through, but an improvement on her performance is clearly needed if she’s to have any chance of doing well.
Score: 5/10
In the Moldovan Wiwi Jury we have 14 Jurors, but only space for 5 reviews. The remaining scores are below:
Bogdan: 0.5/10
Deban: 1.5/10
Denise: 4/10
Cristian: 1/10
Patrick: 1/10
Bernardo: 6/10
Kristin: 5/10
Robyn: 1/10
Luis: 0.5/10
The highest and lowest scores are removed before calculating the final score. We have dropped a low of 0.5 and a high of 6.5.
WIWI JURY SCORE: 2.42
24. Anna Gulko – “Never Let Go”
William: Among the most tedious songs in a rather tedious selection. Chick needs to let go — of this repetitive song, the jarring camera shots and her hopes of winning O melodie pentru Europa. Nice key change though.
Score: 3.5/10
Mikhail: I want to let you go immediately. That was annoyingly creepy. Maybe it could’ve been better with a revamp… No actually. That painful screech… Just stop.
Score: 2.5/10
Antranig: A decent singer with a song that never gets out of first gear. There’s definitely potential here but it is mostly unfulfilled. I feel like I’m listening to the same thing for three minutes — it never gets any better or worse. I would like to see this performed somewhere other than that terrible studio because that does not help her cause at all.
Score: 7/10
Edd: She has a pleasant voice, her English isn’t awful, and the song actually does build to quite an impressive climax. That said, there’s absolutely nothing to make it memorable. She’s going to need some big-budget staging if it’s going to stand out.
Score: 5.5/10
Anthony: “Never Let Go” is a well produced pop ballad, although the chorus bears a similar resemblance to Madonna’s “Ghosttown”. Anna’s a very talented singer and as well as being able to deliver it at a crucial moment, to sing it without any pronunciation issues impressed me. So it doesn’t come as a surprise to see her reaching the semi-finals.
Score: 7/10
In the Moldovan Wiwi Jury we have 14 Jurors, but only space for 5 reviews. The remaining scores are below:
Bogdan: 4.5/10
Deban: 3/10
Denise: 5/10
Cristian: 7/10
Patrick: 3/10
Bernardo: 6/10
Kristin: 5/10
Robyn: 4.5/10
Luis: 3.5/10
The highest and lowest scores are removed before calculating the final score. We have dropped a low of 2.5 and a high of 7.
WIWI JURY SCORE: 4.79
Do you agree with Wiwi Jury? What do you think about these songs? Which one is your favourite?
Woah Anna Gulko is still taking part. Her song is ok. It stays on the same pace..it needs to change to become more interesting. Great to hear her English diction has improved a lot now. ‘Somebody Else’ was my guilty pleasure when she sang it in 2013. Good to know she’s still trying till this day.