Grab your pastizzi, darlings! The Malta Eurovision Song Contest 2017 — the country’s Eurovision selection show — will take place on 18 February. But before then, the Wiwi Jury — our in-house panel of music unprofessionals — is reviewing and rating all 16 competing entries. Today we move on to Klinsmann Coleiro with his song “Laserlight”. Is this laser light about to blind us? Read on to find out…
Klinsmann Coleiro – “Laserlight”
William: Klinsmann brings some clever lyrics and a tongue that can reposition within milliseconds. That’s great, but the song is not. The deep electro horns make this feel heavier than it should and the drums coupled with the annoying backing vocalists scream “cheap wedding entertainment”. Lasers are sharp and precise. This feels a little untidy.
Chris: I’ll be astounded if Klinsmann can deliver this live. “Laserlight” is enjoyable for the time that it’s on, but it’s not memorable. There’s nothing revolutionary about it: certainly a Eurovision non-qualifier. Disposable pop-ish music that just screams “good national final fodder”.
Robyn: “Laserlight” sounds like the sort of track that would have turned up on an FM radio station in the late ’90s. When the song is playing, its breezy, jazzy style makes everything feel ok. But as soon as it’s over, it evaporates into the ether. I quite enjoy it, but for mostly sentimental reasons. Realistically it’s not substantial enough to work as a Eurovision entry.
Josh: “Laserlight” is giving me some unpleasant flashbacks to Denmark’s Anti Social Media from 2015. There’s a reason why they didn’t make the final in Vienna and that’s because it’s not a genre well-suited for Eurovision. I appreciate Klinsmann’s attempt at trying to make this work, but I remain unconvinced that this will crack the top ten in Malta, let alone in Kyiv.
Deban: “Laserlight” is a pleasant listen that could easily swing into the acid-jazz genre. Coleiro’s voice has the right texture to pull it off. That said, his song is structurally forgettable. As I listen again to this entry, I’m eagerly anticipating its last beat.
Our jury for the 2017 Malta Eurovision Song Contest contains 14 jurors, but we only have room for five reviews. The remaining nine scores are listed below.
Before calculating the average score, the highest and lowest scores are dropped. This is to remove outliers and reduce potential bias. We have removed a low of 0 and a high of 7.