It’s a Baltic gold rush! Eurovision selections are simultaneously going down in Estonia, Latvia and Lithuania — home to the longest and most drawn-out selection of all. But fear not. The Wiwi Jury — our in-house panel of music unprofessionals — has the stamina to slay through all of the songs and today we continue to review the qualifying songs from the heats of Lithuania’s Eurovizijos atranka. Next up is Gytis Ivanauskas (aka Lolita Zero) with “Get Frighten”, Milda Martinkenaite & Saulene Chlevickaite with “Paperheart” and Vidas Bareikis & Ieva Zasimauskaite with “I Love My Phone”. Did any of these songs frighten us? Read on to find out!

Gytis Ivanauskas (Lolita Zero) – “Get Frighten”

“Get Frighten” reviews

Robyn: Yes, ok, this song is a tie-in with an action film which somehow involves this parody of a Eurovision performance, watermelons and all. But when I’ve been sitting through all these other Eurovizijos atranka qualifiers that range from “mind-numbingly dull” to “s’ok I suppose”, this makes me pay attention. “Get Frighten” entertains me. It puts a smile on my face and I delight in the drama and spectacle. I love you, Lithuania.

Score: 10/10

Anthony: Hell no! I seriously hope Lithuania aren’t lulled into a false sense of security, just because Lolita Zero plays a role in an upcoming Lithuanian film. The electronic instrumentals are more than enough to give me tinnitus after a minute. Seeing this in Kyiv will drag us back to 00s Eurovision where joke acts are rife. It even makes LT United look like an instant masterpiece.

Score: 0/10

Antranig: The show and staging get a resounding 10 out of 10 from me. This hits you in the face and is one of the most memorable entries of the 2017 national final season. Unfortunately, the song is, to put it nicely, abysmal. She certainly caught my attention and gave me three minutes of laughs and it would be a great joke entry at Eurovision. However, Lithuania probably aren’t looking for a joke.

Score: 7/10

Luis: I suppose there’s a moment in life when you need to put on a couple of giant glitter antlers and smash watermelons on a stage. Bizarre, rococó, kitsch, you name it, Lolita serves it. I’m actually in shock. No joke, I had to ask my flatmates for help, and they are also in shock now. I need a glass of wine. Or two.

Score: 0/10

Renske: It is humorous and it is fun, but please, please don’t send this. Many artists in Lithuania’s Eurovizijos atranka have proved that they have way more suitable songs for Eurovision than “Get Frighten”. It is seriously a huge mess on all fronts. If Lithuania sends this, they would only embarrass themselves.

Score: 1/10

In the Lithuanian Wiwi Jury, we have 12 jurors but only room for 5 reviews. The rest of our scores can be found below:

Bernardo: 0/10

Dayana: 3.5/10

Deban: 2/10

Jordi: 5.5/10

Josh: 5/10

Patrick: 0/10

Sinan: 5.5/10

 

 

 

 

Before calculating the average score, the highest and lowest scores are dropped. This is to remove outliers and reduce potential bias. We have removed a low of 0 and a high of 10.

WIWI JURY VERDICT: 2.95/10

Milda Martinkenaite & Saulene Chlevickaite – “Paperheart”

“Paperheart” reviews

Antranig: I thought the song title was “Paper Light” for a second and I thought that was a daring choice. Unfortunately, this isn’t a daring entry. They have excellent stage presence and are obviously talented performers, but the song is ultimately lets them down. It’s not bad, it’s just forgettable. I wouldn’t listen to a studio version but I enjoy watching these ladies sell it on stage.

Score: 6.5/10

Luis: If Belarus has taught us anything, it is that two people singing a love song directed to a third person doesn’t work unless they rig the televote. Milda and Saulene bring an utterly cheesy song. Also, the “go girl” moment was ridiculous. There’s so much cheese coming from this performance that you could make a raclette.

Score: 1/10

Anthony: Having gone down the same route together, two of last year’s participants joined forces with their own entry. Sadly, their songwriting team have shown that two heads aren’t always better than one. The combined vocals from Milda and Saulene feels disjointed. Instead of the chemistry we’d expect from duets, they ended up serving more cheese than a Stinking Bishop.

Score: 5/10

Renske: This paper heart needs to burn to ashes. Seriously, this needs some fire and some spice. Even Milda and Saulene seem tired of their own song. And so am I, already after the first listen.

Score: 4.5/10

Robyn: Sorry girls, but Svala from Iceland is owning the paper metaphor song this year. The Icelandic “Paper” is such a strong composition that in comparison “Paperheart” sounds like a cheesy ’80s ballad given a cheap 2016 sound. And why is it a duet? Are they lovers? Are they singing to a shared boyfriend? So many questions.

Score: 4.5/10

In the Lithuanian Wiwi Jury, we have 12 jurors but only room for 5 reviews. The rest of our scores can be found below:

Bernardo: 3.5/10

Dayana: 3.5/10

Deban: 3/10

Jordi: 6/10

Josh: 4/10

Patrick: 3/10

Sinan: 7/10

 

 

 

 

Before calculating the average score, the highest and lowest scores are dropped. This is to remove outliers and reduce potential bias. We have removed a low of 1 and a high of 7.

WIWI JURY VERDICT: 4.35/10

Vidas Bareikis & Ieva Zasimauskaite – “I Love My Phone”

“I Love My Phone” reviews

Antranig: Boy, do I love a good joke entry. The lyrics are so bizarre but they are so fitting and accurate in 2017. This also really stands out because it’s a joke entry but it’s not a bad song — the instrumental sections, choruses and the dancing really work. When you’ve got a lot of average songs in your national final, just call it quits and send one of the joke entries. Please.

Score: 8/10

Luis: Lithuania, seriously. How many vodkas did Ieva and Vidas have while writing this? And how many vodka shots did people drink to cast their vote — and spend money — on this? This is probably the silliest entry this year, in all selections.

Score: 0/10

Anthony: The whole concept of an entry about a smartphone sounds like a disaster waiting to happen, but this is surprisingly entertaining despite the novelty factor. While Ieva gets credit for showing an entirely different, fun-loving side of herself, she might be better off focusing on her solo attempt as I see casual Eurovision viewers taking this as seriously as a certain social networking song.

Score: 6/10

Renske: Although this song is so true and funny, it is one of the creepiest potential Eurovision songs I have ever heard. Credits to Valdas and Ieva for their stage performance, it makes the song’s message clear and it was fun to watch. Ironically, though, the song is about a current topic, but it is so passé.

Score: 5/10

Robyn: “I Love My Phone” feels like the natural successor to Valentina Monetta’s “The Social Network Song”, a playful examination of the way new technology impacts our lives. It’s a lot of fun and Vidas and Eava have delivered a bright and energetic performance — a welcome change from all the boring singers intent on standing still. I’d like to see this in Lithuania’s grand final.

Score: 6.5/10

In the Lithuanian Wiwi Jury, we have 12 jurors but only room for 5 reviews. The rest of our scores can be found below:

Bernardo: 1/10

Dayana: 4/10

Deban: 2.5/10

Jordi: 6.5/10

Josh: 3/10

Patrick: 0/10

Sinan: 6.5/10

 

 

 

 

Before calculating the average score, the highest and lowest scores are dropped. This is to remove outliers and reduce potential bias. We have removed a low of 0 and a high of 8.

WIWI JURY VERDICT: 4.1/10

See our list of Eurovizijos atranka rankings here

Follow all our Lithuania Eurovision news

9 Comments
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Thomasfan22
Thomasfan22
3 years ago

PLEASE don’t send Lolita Zero. Joke entries are just old and stale at this point of time.

an esc fan
an esc fan
3 years ago

@ Charles
What do you mean ”LGBT-attempt”?
What about Loreen and her bisexuality used to still be relevant, despite her punk song, and non-existent music career.

an esc fan
an esc fan
3 years ago

Lolita Zero is a serious actor, I wonder why can’t he sing live in any way he can, this is just a missed opportunity. He should just sing, an actor faces those situations, it is not possible to win the televote, and you, as artist, to be so cheap, when it is so easy to upgrade your act by yourself.

AngieP
AngieP
3 years ago

No, nothing here.
I won’t say anything about Lolita Zero. I let it speak for itself.
The other two aren’t sth great.

Charles
Charles
3 years ago

LOLITA ZERO is the that one desperate solution fans seek to cure them from the musical aspect of Eurovision to make sure the entertaining circus still takes place in the hopes that people treating music with respect and seriousness stay at home and that no further slower songs (also known as “boring ballads”) stay away from sight and mind … and that is all I can say about this LGBT-attempt-playback meltdown. Enjoy it! 🙂

cheesecake
cheesecake
3 years ago

Lolita ZERO. There you have it.

MarioMario
3 years ago

I Love My Phone is MUCH WORSE than Get Frighten, even though they are both HORRENDOUS.

Polegend Godgarina
Polegend Godgarina
3 years ago

Ieva is DESPERATE to represent Lithuania, but she won’t succeed as long as she has mediocre songs with messy titles. Last year in Vilnius I met a woman who looked exactly like Polina Gagarina, who told me she had voted for Ieva’s Life (Not That Beautiful) in Eurovizijos 2016 lmao!

Lolita Zero is entertaining but the falsetto is too much.

(J)ESC Fanatic
(J)ESC Fanatic
3 years ago

I really hope Lolita Zero won’t win, her entry is horrendous, I can’t even call it music. Milda & Saulene and Vidas & Ieva have OK, fun songs.