The Wiwi Jury — our in-house panel of music unprofessionals — continues to rank and review the 43 songs competing in Eurovision 2018. Next we journey to Norway where Eurovision 2009 winner Alexander Rybak is back with “That’s How You Write a Song”. Did we follow his instructions? Read on to find out!
Alexander Rybak – “That’s How You Write a Song”
“That’s How You Write a Song” reviews
Angus: Is it dorky? Yes. Dated? Yes. Jarring? Yes. And yet Alexander Rybak’s magnetism is hard to resist. Rybak may not be trying very hard on “That’s How You Write A Song” but he doesn’t have to. The national final staging was fun, the song will grab casual viewers easily, and the man has a cult of personality thanks to winning the contest in 2009. The whole thing is annoyingly irresistible. You don’t want to tap your toe, because you wish he’d sent a better song, but here we are all tapping our toes in time to the beat.
Anthony: This is where the phrase of not judging a book by its cover comes in handy, and this self-penned entry fails to live up to the song title. Attempting to outdo “Fairytale” is a massive ask, but I expected better from the former Eurovision winner. There’s no doubt Rybak’s stage presence is the main selling point for Norway and of course, doing what he does best with that fiddle.
Bernardo: When you’re trying to make a comeback after winning, you have big shoes to fill. Is Alexander able to do it? No. While “That’s How You Write A Song” makes you tap your feet on the ground, that’s all it does. Lyrically uninspired and borderline annoying, I wouldn’t give Rybak a ticket to the final.
Deban: “That’s How You Write a Song” is nothing but an infantile DIY composition jam-packed with gimmicks. It is difficult to decipher whether this was composed under the influence, or crafted to be taken seriously. Furthermore, it lacks an infectious melody. A disappointing return for a musician who once held the record for Eurovision’s highest scoring entry.
Padraig: It’s been years since Norway last entered Junior Eurovision. But one could easily be fooled into thinking “That’s How You Write A Song” is their glorious comeback to the contest. If sung by Barney the Dinosaur or the Tweenies this might be passable entertainment for toddlers. Not so much when 30-something-year-old Alexander Rybak is singing it on the adult Eurovision stage. His endless enthusiasm and charisma make this just about tolerable, but it is leagues behind the all-conquering “Fairytale”. Had a lesser performer taken this on, it would most likely be Electro Velvet 2.0.
Steinunn: Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Alexander Rybak is a legend, no doubt about that. But this is just a mess. This song is probably supposed to be funny and catchy, but I just find it annoying. Particularly that attempt at scatting. Rybak won by a landslide back in 2009, where his cute boyish charm was a big factor landing him that record breaking victory. Now nine years later, that charm has turned more into the direction of arrogance. The boy still can sing though.
In the Wiwi Jury we have 20 jurors but only have room for six reviews. The remaining scores are below:
We have removed the highest and lowest scores prior to calculating the average. This is to remove outliers and potential bias. We have removed a low of 2 and a high of 9.5.
Wiwi Jury verdict: 5.44/10
What do you think of this song? Share your own score and review below!