Being an avid Eurovision fan from the United States, I usually find myself pondering several hypothetical questions about a possible run at the contest. Now, I am perfectly aware that it’s impossible and will never happen, but it’s fun to think “What if?” sometimes. The one question that I have thought about the most is without a doubt, “Who would we send if by some miracle we were allowed to participate?” And despite how easy it may seem to come up with a name, it’s actually more complicated than it seems.
When thinking about participants at Eurovision, there doesn’t seem to be a set pattern regarding who a nation sends. For example, the U.K. appears to be in a rut, sending washed up has-been cronies like Engelbert Humperdinck despite having a flurry of hip artists to choose from, while San Marino is having a love affair (a perfectly understandable one in my opinion) with Valentina Monetta, recently announcing her as their representative for the third year in a row. Other nations have varying outputs as well, ranging from unknown artists, to past winners, to national and international stars. Keeping all of this in mind, it’s a tad daunting to think of someone we could send, considering the size of our music industry.
The one thing that you have to keep in mind when pondering an American representative is fairness. For example, it might be easy to just spit out names like Britney Spears or Beyonce, however that wouldn’t be a fair choice to other nations. Most of our popular musicians already have a dominant chart presence across Europe, and if they were sent to Eurovision they would likely massacre the televote. Or, they might pull a Cascada and tank, Eurovision often proves to be surprising in that manner. If they participated, the U.S. would need to send one of its more “low key” artists, ones that have a chart presence yet aren’t “A-List”, at least in Europe. I have a few personal choices in mind, and I’m going to try to touch a few different genres.
If the U.S. went the dance route, I think Dev would make a good choice. Her feature on Far East Movement’s “Like a G6” launched her into the public eye, and she has had some lingering popularity since then, with her single “In The Dark” doing well in the charts. Her pumping beats and heavy bass would make for a very fun entry, however this might be a risky move, as dance entries are known to be unpredictable in terms of final results.
“In The Dark” would be an excellent electro-pop entry.
If the U.S. wanted a more “rocker” approach, selecting Alanis Morissette would be an AMAZING choice. Alanis hails from Canada, however she also has American citizenship. She had her career peak in the 90’s, but still has a presence in the music scene. An entry reminiscent of material on her masterpiece “Jagged Little Pill” would do extremely well I believe, Alanis has a knack for screaming about douche-bag men in key, and her quirky attitude would win people over easily.
Is she as mad as Amandine? I predict mic-stand massacre.
If the U.S. went with the “pretty much unknown” approach, I’d love for Beth Ditto to be chosen. “I Wrote The Book” is her only “hit”, and it was essentially a sleeper hit at that, mainly charting in Europe (which is good in this case). Despite its moderate popularity, the song itself is VERY good. It has a very catchy rhythm, the chorus gets into your head and sticks, and Beth is known to be unpredictable so the stage show would likely be memorable as well. Plus, I like how she embraces her body image, she’s proud of herself, and I respect her a lot!
Beth Ditto’s “divaesque” disco voice and sound would be a cool addition to the mix of (tired) ballads and schlager.
Country is one of the dominant genres over here, and if we took that path, Miranda Lambert would make a fine choice. She’s one of the most popular country artists in the States, however in Europe she hasn’t had the same popularity. Her distinctive twang and attitude would bring something fresh and original to Eurovision, and she might pull a “disappearing guitar” à la Anna Bergendahl. (That always baffled me!) Texas Lightning did do country in 2006, but that was a stereotypical, fake southern drawl, wild-wild west size mess.
Miranda doesn’t play around, and has powerhouse vocals that work in all the right ways.
What do you think? If my dream came true and we got to compete, would you like any of these artists to go, or who else would you want to represent the good old US of A? Let us know with a comment!
Zachary Thomas is Wisconsin-based correspondent for WiwiBloggs.com. Follow him on Twitter @CheerZach. Then follow the team from wiwibloggs.com on Twitter at @wiwibloggs to keep up with the latest Eurovision news and gossip!