The Wiwi Jury, our in-house panel of music unprofessionals, is in Chisinau and is busy reviewing the songs from Moldova’s national selection O melodie pentru Europa 2017. We continue with the band THE ONE and their song “Dance”. Will the track make us get up and dance or sit down and press the button for the next one? Let’s find out!
THE ONE – “Dance”
“Dance” reviews
William: THE ONE that got away? No. THE ONE that melds dated rock with throwback Eurotrash disco? Absolutely! The song is a disaster that can’t decide on a genre and the lead singer sounds as if he is shouting “jazz hands”on loop. But he kicks and dances and thrusts with abandon and has a strange and quirky charm. As does the keyboard player who may or may not be an ex-convict. I shouldn’t like this. But the three minutes just sped by, unlike the endless stream of dirges in this selection. “Dance” is a fresh breath of stale air.
Score: 7/10
Chris: Oh my. The lead singer clearly wants to be as cool as Justin Timberlake. Instead, he comes off like a drunk dad at a wedding. The funny thing is that I’m going to assume that his dad is at the keyboard, with those fashionable glasses on a chain. Just so, so amateur!
Score: 2.5/10
Robyn: These guys are quite fun, with the youthful lead singer’s Jedward 2011 leaps and the rest of the band looking like they’ve been rocking since the ’90s. But that can’t save the song. It’s repetitive and despite being about the joy of dancing, it just drags. It’s not enjoyable.
Score: 3/10
Deban: The singer’s infectious energy sets the right tone. However, it fizzles into a joke act rather quickly. Clearly a band influenced by the sounds of Scissor Sisters, THE ONE has moderate appeal, and “Dance” has enough likability to be memorable.
Score: 6/10
Bogdan: A mix of pop, disco, and rock, “Dance” is very much all over the place, not unlike the singer was at the live audition. Both spatially and vocally, he struggled to compensate for the song’s utter simplicity and lack of imagination. Thankfully, “Dance” is shorter than three minutes, but it still feels one minute too long, given the absence of a bridge and the repetitiveness of the word “dance”. Terrible.
Score: 2.5/10
In our Moldova Wiwi Jury, we have 17 jurors but only room for 5 reviews. The rest of our scores can be found below:
Anthony: 6/10
Antranig: 8/10
Bernardo: 2/10
Cinan: 3.5/10
Dayana: 5/10
Jason: 3.5/10
Josh: 5/10
Kristin: 5.5/10
Luis: 6/10
Patrick: 3/10
Sami: 8/10
Zakaria: 3/10
Before calculating the average score, the highest and lowest scores are dropped. This is to remove outliers and reduce potential bias. We have removed a low of 2 and a high of 8.
Oh my. At least it made me laugh.