Die Grosse Entscheidungsshow, Switzerland’s national selection for Eurovision 2014, takes place on February 1. So in recent days the Wiwi Jury—our in-house panel of music unprofessionals—has been busy sharepning our claws and stock piling ear plugs. We’re now ready to start reviewing the six acts in this year’s competition.

First up is 3ForAll with “Together Forever”. Did it fill us with a sense of “We Are One”? Or were we ready to split? Read on to find out…

Angus: So this basically rips off ‘Americano’ by Lady Gaga. It’s very overtly Latin flecked, but underscored by some French accordion and a pretty universal hand-clappy beat. It’s cheery enough but way too lightweight to even put me in mind of making the Final. It’s so painfully dated and desperately cheery. The smile isn’t fooling me though.

Score: 2.5/10

Bogdan: If I knew what guilt was, I guess this would be my guilty pleasure. I know this song is hated by many, but for me it was love at first listen. Unlike Angus, I don’t hear “Americano”, but a crowd-pleaser “Europeano” that could do brilliantly on the Eurovision stage.  It’s happy and anthemic and I think it could do very well with the general audience. And I don’t hear a dated melody, but a certain nostalgic quality. Its only downfalls are the cheesy lyrics (a big problem indeed) and the over-the-top bridge, but otherwise “Together Forever” sounds like a winner. In Switzerland, at least.

Score: 9/10

Padraig: Do we really need yet another happy clappy song from the Swiss? I think not, particularly when it’s as dire as this. I know the intention behind the song is one of joy and peace but I couldn’t help getting a Stepford Wives vibe. And can you imagine being stuck with this lot and their blasted accordion forever? You’d be driven demented!

Score: 3/10

The 3ForAll parody video:

Anthony: Sorry folks, but after hearing it for the first time and several listens later, it sounded like 3ForAll are heading into freefall.It sounds rather camp and kitschy for my taste and the cheesy lyrics certainly won’t help either. This entry is as cringeworthy as receiving a pair of socks for a late Christmas present. The only highlight from all this is probably the use of the accordion, which adds some uptempo catchiness to a rather uninspiring effort.

Score: 4/10

Deban: Very circa 2006, the year Six4One burst onto the music scene courtesy of Ralph Siegel, and represented Switzerland at the Eurovision Song Contest in Athens. Honestly, don’t producers do their reserach? Nothing about this band’s name, format, or music is original. Together Forever borrows Rick Astley’s song title, flavours it with an overdose of Mandinga, and pads it out with pageant lyrics. It’s not even good enough for a parody.

Score: 2/10

Wiwi: The accordion and thumping dance beat make this sound like something from the Romanian national final…in the late 90s. That I can live with. What I find more difficult to take is the call-to-arms to love each other. Their heart is in the right place, but their brains are not. Who thought this was a good idea?! This would struggle to get out of the semi-final at Eurovision, but, in what is a lackluster year in Switzerland, it actually has a chance to win at home. Sad times.

Score: 4/10

Wiwi Jury Verdict: 4.08/10

You can read all of our reviews and rankings for Die Grosse Entscheidungsshow by clicking here. You can also keep up with the latest Eurovision news and gossip by following the team from wiwibloggs.com on Twitter @wiwibloggs and by liking our Facebook page.

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Pera
Guest
Pera

My TOP 6
1. Christian Tschanz – Au Paradis
2. 3ForAll – Together Forever
3. Yasmina Hunzinger – I Still Believe
4. Sebalter – Hunter Of Stars
5. Natacha & Stéphanie – Une Terre Sans Vous
6. Nino Colonna – La Luce Del Cuore

dhani
Guest

haha i love how everybody on wiwibloggs hate all the swiss songs. because they are very mature and adult-sounding and all songs not are performed by unmature 20-year old popchicks with another boring dance song. like that terrible gosia-song everybody loved. that was a really cheap piece of crap and it got what it deserved!! all switzerlands songs are great this year and you would know, if you have a good and mature taste in music! i love all the swiss songs but i think yasmina hunzinger or christian tschanz should win. i believe all the song could make the… Read more »

D
Guest
D

This is probably my least favourite song in the Swiss selection. My favourites are “Hunter of Stars” and “Une terre sans vous”.

Z24
Guest
Z24

Honestly, if you need me to choose between an upbeat, catchy, sugar-coated, kitschy, “all together” tune against one with exactly the same theme, but in a slow, pretenious ballad (Yasmina, Dina Garipova), the first one wins by a mile.

Those who gave low points to this song for the theme will have to give Yasmina the same or lower amount, sicne it’s exactly the same thing on a different tempo, otherwise I feel there may be a double standard.

Ronaldo
Guest
Ronaldo

Switzerland is trying really hard to stay in the semi-finals again this year. This is so bad. And I think it may win because the others are even worse 🙁

Bb
Guest
Bb

Unbelievably cringeworthy, but Switzerland doesn’t exactly have a great crop of songs to choose from. At least last year’s entry from the Swiss had some level of charm and appeal. This is generic in every way and to be quite honest a hot mess… I get a little queasy at the prospect of this heading to Copenhagen.