The Wiwi Jury — our in-house panel of music unprofessionals — now turns to the UK, where we will be rating and reviewing the six entries competing in the UK’s Eurovision: You Decide. First up, we take a look at the girl group MAID (made up of Blythe, Miracle and Kat) and their version of “Freaks”. Did we buy their version of high school life? Read on to find out!
MAID – “Freaks”
Antranig: Don’t get me started on how inappropriate the word “soccer” sounds in a British entry. This song builds up really nicely and has a dark and tantalising edge. Of the three songs, this is the one that has the most personality and the potential to stand out. However, both versions need some polish to their execution to stand a chance at Eurovision. Of all six acts, MAID have the greatest potential to achieve a good result with some sexy harmonies. But in its current state, it is weaker than Jordan’s version.
Chris: A rejected mid-00s MCR track that has somehow been ported over and accepted by the BBC. Put that together with a frankly bizarre composition and there’s just no way to sell this one. MAID might all be talented vocalists and musical theatre stars, but there’s no smoke and mirrors here. This is not good.
Julian: There is so much potential here. The different harmonies from those incredibly talented singers sound very interesting and fit to the “Freaks” theme. I kind of like the verses but the chorus isn’t outstanding. However, the BBC definitely didn’t make use of this potential as the song itself has nothing where any viewers at home feel like they have to vote for this song in the grand final. I don’t think it is the worst song of this selection but it nevertheless isn’t a song that will end the UK’s curse at Eurovision.
Luis: In the history of national finals, there haven’t been many lyrics worse than “We are the freaks, nah nah, tragedy”. To begin with, “Freaks” is the least interesting of the three songs, and this version is so stripped down that it reveals all its many flaws. MAID’s harmonies are the only remarkable feature of this act, but they’re also a problem: there are three people singing when the verses are so clearly about a single person, and hence, it’s difficult to see a connection between them and the song, even in the studio version.
Pablo: For starters, the song is indeed the weakest we’ve heard for the UK in a while, and this is just the worst way to present it. A little boy’s song by a a girl group with such morose and bland music on the back, it makes them look morose and bland. Everything about this wouldn’t stick together even if you had crazy glue. Dodgy lyrics, slow and sultry verses, a Pachebel chorus and harmonies where there should not be; this entry has it all, and not in a good way.
William: I’m a huge fan of dark pop. But giving a song titled “Freaks” the dark treatment renders it just a bit too Halloween for my liking. The slow pace and gothic harmonies — with the ladies singing “we are freaks” — makes this impossible to take seriously. I just want to call Casper and have a laugh.
In our Eurovision: You Decide Wiwi Jury, we have 12 jurors but only room for 6 reviews. The rest of our scores can be found below:
Before calculating the average score, the highest and lowest scores are dropped. This is to remove outliers and reduce potential bias. We have removed a low of 1 and a high of 6.5.