Celebrity tweeters are a mixed bunch. Many see Twitter as merely a tool to share banal observations and push promo material. BORING!!! Thankfully, there are those who realise that most of us join the social network to be entertained – like Kitty Brucknell. The British X Factor star hoping to represent Switzerland at Eurovision 2015 is no humdrum tweeter. Just check out the tale she regaled to her Kitty Divas last night. We’d say she’s a breath of fresh air except … well read on and you’ll understand.
Warning: Don’t read if you’re about to sit down to dinner.
I’m going to tell u a funny story: it will be gross and make u laugh. Ready????
— Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
I’ve got a bit of a …um… Digestion issue. And sometimes it hits at unfortunate places. — Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
And I left my date sitting there for 20mins while i strain and struggle on the loo. Then…it’s like a plug is pulled…and….????????????????????????????????????????????????????
— Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
I don’t know if any of you have IBS but it’s bloody painful. I was quite vocal in the loo. Considerably so. — Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
I was really REALLY vocal. So much so that the restaurant, being super posh and everything, got really worried and knocked on the loo door
— Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
When the response was Ughhghdhsyhebsbsjsh they got a bit more worried and the next thing they’ve got someone and they are trying to — Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
Give me medical assistance. All the while my date is sitting there oblivious thinking I’ve probably run off.
— Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
I think they thought i was preggers or something. Anyway…so I finally pull myself together and open the door and out comes THE WORST STINK — Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
My runny poop smells something awful. Like a dead rat blended with the farts of a camel and cow dung.
— Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
And basically they thought I was dying in there, and I had to walk past the restaurant manager and our waiter and the whole bloodyrestaurant — Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
To my seat and finish the night with my date. Everyone knew the smell was mine. WORST DATE EVER.
— Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
Soo….that’s my ???????????????????? story. Hehe. — Kitty Brucknell (@kittybrucknell) October 17, 2014
Never change Kitty!
seriously… shes such an attention seeker. her switzerland song is awful too.
By being vocal, she means she made noises with her vocal chords?
I would have thought she might have been rectally awkward.
Here I am sitting on the loo, being very vocal, a.k.a. laughing out loud.