The first dress rehearsal of the second semi-final took place last night inside Baku’s Crystal Hall. Wiwi and Vebooboo grabbed a front-row seat for the action and can now report who soared—and who should consider booking an early flight home. Below we offer a taste of what you can expect during tonight’s live broadcast. We also include our overall prediction of where each country will place in the semi-final. This prediction combines rankings issued by the Wiwi Jury (25%), the Eurovision press poll (25%), and the WiwiBloggs.Com fan poll (50%).
Read this ahead of the show, or follow along as the contestants take to the stage tonight at 21:00 CET. Consider this our pre-recorded commentary. Love, Team Wiwi
Tonight’s opening act and postcards are nothing to write home about, so let’s get straight to our thoughts of each of the country’s performances.
1. Serbia: Zeljko Joksimovic with “Nije ljubav stvar” (Love Is Not a Thing)
Memorable lyrics: “I wish you just the best. This love is my sinking ship.”
The first semi-final started with the worst song of the night, so it was a huge relief to find out that Serbia would open up tonight’s show. Zeljko is no stranger to Eurovision: he finished second the last time around. He delivers a dramatic performance with simple but effective staging. We particularly love the sequence where two violinists stand opposite each other and seem to duel with their strings. The Eastern European folk crowd will love this one. Think Dino Merlin’s “Love in Rewind” from last year, but with less jumping around and a much more solemn tone.
Prediction: 2 Wiwi Jury: 2 ESC Press Poll: 3 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 2
2. FYR Macedonia: Kaliopi with “Crno i belo”
Memorable lyrics: “I’m naked, wild and free, now it’s time, step into me.”
From one strong singer to another, from one Eurovision veteran to the next, Kalliopi continues the drama with a moving power ballad. She may come off as stern in this song about fighting for love, but she’s actually a crazy and hilarious lady in real life. We love the staging. It starts out focused on Kaliopi’s face. Then back-up instrumentalists pop out of nowhere. Clearly Kalliopi and Pastora Soler are in cahoots and worked together in the construction industry. Both girls know how to build drama. And while jury member Meows Kitty has compared Kaliopi’s voice to a chain smoker, it works. Kaliopi’s dark, mysterious tone reflects the depth of her song.
Prediction: 8 Wiwi Jury: 7 ESC Press Poll: 10 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 11
3. Netherlands: Joan Franka with “You and Me”
Memorable lyrics: “It’s you and me and everybody out there, and I can see that everybody knows about us.”
The Netherlands hasn’t had much success in recent years. Correction: they haven’t had any. But the Wiwi team sincerely hopes this year will be different. Joan Franka could win Miss Congeniality: she shows up at all the parties, and never refuses a photo opp with fans. But more importantly, the tone of her voice is something special. And with the Native American costume drama hopefully behind her, Joan will hopefully march straight to the Final (with her tomahawk in hand). The only negative of her performance is that there isn’t any staging at all. In any event, call us Walt Disney: we love a singing Pocahontas!
Prediction: 5 Wiwi Jury: 4 ESC Press Poll: 9 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 4
4. Malta: Kurt Calleja with “This is the Night”
Memorable lyrics: “I will be the star, let me in your heart.”
You can’t judge a book by its cover, and you certainly can’t judge a song by its name. Kurt sings about this being his night, but we sadly think he is delusional. Having a DJ on stage didn’t work for Croatia’s Daria Kinzer, and it doesn’t really work here either. But we have to say that Kurt’s vocals and staging have both improved overall. They’ve added some fantastic footwork since the Maltese national final, and Kurt does a great job working the entire stage. He actually has a chance of making it through to the Final. But please change that t-shirt…your rolls are showing!
Prediction: 13 Wiwi Jury: 14 ESC Press Poll: 6 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 10
5. Belarus: Litesound with “We Are the Heroes”
Memorable lyrics: ” ’cause we are the winners, we are the heroes.”
Apparently having a taut body gives guys a license to wear fishnet. The Belarusians pulled a couple of moves from Sakis Rouvas’ gravity-defying entry “This Is the Night”…and it works! Hungary made it through on Tuesday, and this rock song has a ruul ruul good chance of doing the same. It’s in a genre all its own, and that could be enough. Our major concern lies with the lead singer’s bizarre habit of voguing for the camera and raising his right arm while pointing at the sky. He needs to mix it up.
Prediction: 11 Wiwi Jury: 8 ESC Press Poll: 10 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 15
6. Portugal: Filipa Sousa with “Vida minha” (Life of Mine)
Memorable lyrics: “And within me, there’s only desire to come home and hold you.”
After five good songs and a break, it’s only fair to have to sit through a horrible one. Filipa Sousa fits the bill. Yes, we applaud Portugal for yet again pulling the cultural card, but can’t y’all spice it up a bit? A fado is a love song about pain, and this one makes us hurt. Girl needs to go…and quick!
Prediction: 17 Wiwi Jury: 15 ESC Press Poll: 10 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 12
7. Ukraine: Gaitana with “Be My Guest”
Memorable lyrics: “Welcome, people, be my guest.”
Gaitana couldn’t have a better start order. Following one of the dullest entries of the year automatically makes your song sound much more interesting. Gaitana pumps up the volume like no other in “Be My Guest.” The Congolese-Ukrainian diva has had to endure quite a bit of drama because of her ethnic background, and at one point in the song she literally gets down on her knees to beg for your support. We love the crazy back-up dancers wearing Cossack tie-dye. We love the virtual dancers on her LED screens. We love the way she marches onto the stage in the opening bars and presents herself as if she were a flight attendant performing a safety demonstration. If this upbeat song with impeccable LED staging and major attitude doesn’t make it through to the Final, we will be seriously upset.
Prediction: 6 Wiwi Jury: 9 ESC Press Poll: 5 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 13
8. Bulgaria: Sofia Marinova with “Love Unlimited”
Sofi Marinova sings in more languages than anyone else this year, and she ends her song with the cheesiest line of all: “I love you so much.” But don’t get things mixed up – this disco number actually has a much deeper message. Sofi sings about love crossing all racial, ethnic, and sexual boundaries, and this tolerance boost is more than welcome, especially considering the city she will be singing in tonight. We really hope to see her huge nipples on stage again on Saturday. But seriously, you need to up the staging investment in this number. A pink back-drop and stand-still choreography does not satisfy our appetite!
Prediction: 7 Wiwi Jury: 5 ESC Press Poll: 17 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 9
9. Slovenia: Eva Boto with “Verjamem” (I believe)
Memorable lyrics: “I never surrender until the very end”
Eva is young. You can see in our interview with her that she literally can’t control her excitement. Unfortunately, we cannot return the favour. This song doesn’t go anywhere. They try to build drama but it flops. Girl can sing, but we wish she would sing something much more interesting. There are a lot of ballads this year, and this ain’t one that we will miss saying good-bye to tonight. Also, can we get the crazy back-up singer in white some Prozac? Her moaning is seriously unattractive.
Prediction: 9 Wiwi Jury: 10 ESC Press Poll: 10 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 7
10. Croatia: Nina Badric with “Nebo”
Memorable lyrics: “And these tears of mine will weigh heavily on your soul.”
My favourite part of this act is when it ends. You can distinguish it from Bosnia’s Maya Sar, who offers a similarly bland ballad later in the evening, by the large roll of toilet paper that Maya Sar unfurls at the climax of her song. If it mirrored this act’s quality, it might include a few stains. We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again. There’s something missing from Maya Sar. It’s the T. She ain’t a star.
Prediction: 16 Wiwi Jury: 17 ESC Press Poll: 10 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 8
11. Sweden: Loreen with “Euphoria”
Memorable lyrics: “We’re going u-u-u-u-u-u-up”
Sweden couldn’t possibly have a better starting position. Like Ukraine, it follows some of the evening’s worst acts. There has been much hype about Loreen—she’s the frontrunner for tonight and for the whole thing as well. And at today’s rehearsal Loreen nailed the vocals. We were super pleased to see that the camera never really pans out. Instead, it focuses on Loreen’s little world, completely ignoring the fact that there are actually four back-up singers in the background. Loreen is definitely making the Final, but whether she can beat tacky—but endearing—Russia remains an open question.
Prediction: 1 Wiwi Jury: 1 ESC Press Poll: 1 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 1
Georgia: Anri Jokhadze with “I’m a Jocker”
Memorable lyrics: “Got no fear, got no tear baby, never and never.”
Anri is without a doubt the craziest contestant this year. He has a big mouth and ain’t afraid to use it during interviews. And this spunk certainly shows in his three-minute performance. This song is oh so random, but it will stand out as a result, and we think it actually has a solid chance of making the Final tonight. Anri’s song is a big joke, but we all need a bit of a laugh once in a while.
Prediction: 18 Wiwi Jury: 18 ESC Press Poll: 7 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 18
13. Turkey: Can Bonomo with “Love Me Back”
Memorable lyrics: “Hop on to my ship baby I’ll make you fly.”
Turkey didn’t make it through to the final last year, and this year Can has come back for revenge. The Vin Diesel look-a-like delivers an ethnically-flavoured performance that will make western Europeans remember their summer holidays. And no, those aren’t bats dancing in the background. They are actually Turkish men who use gray and white blankets rather effectively to create pirate ships on stage.
Prediction: 4 Wiwi Jury: 13 ESC Press Poll: 2 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 3
14. Estonia: Ott Lepland with “Kuula”
Memorable lyrics: “Listen – my heart has a voice.”
With so many female ballads in this year’s competition, it is nice to see a man give it a go. The vocals here are impeccable, but the song is a real snooze fest. And the fact that it is in Estonian doesn’t help either. We would recommend you read the song’s lyrics, but to be honest you’d be wasting your time.
Prediction: 14 Wiwi Jury: 11 ESC Press Poll: 8 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 14
15. Slovakia: Max Jason Mai with “Don’t Close Your Eyes”
Memorable lyrics: “Don’t close your eyes and pray all the night.”
If this were a modeling competition, Max Jason Mai would have a serious chance of winning. After all, he wears more mascara than Sabina Babayeva and shows more body than Elefteria Eleftheriou. But this is a singing competition. Dude ain’t gonna win, but hard rock numbers always stand out. This epileptic-shock inducing number will have your ears ringing for the rest of the night. After watching his smooth and evenly-toned torso for three minutes, we’re curious if he puts make-up on that, too.
Prediction: 10 Wiwi Jury: 6 ESC Press Poll: 10 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 17
16. Norway: Tooji with “Stay”
Memorable lyrics: “But I know I want you to STAY, nanananana”
Tooji was gracious enough to teach us his signature dance moves during our recent interview. We were left exhausted, and you’ll see why as he works the stage tonight. He must have strong thighs to endure all that squatting! Tooji, a highly-educated social worker, dumbs down the lyrics for the everyday man and delivers pop to the max. He is an underdog in this competition, but should easily pass through to the Final. But the cameras need to pan out a lot less. And if both he and Max Jason Mai make it through, the city of Baku may have to order some more make-up from the West.
Prediction: 3 Wiwi Jury: 4 ESC Press Poll: 12 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 6
17. Bosnia: Maya Sar with “Korake ti znam” (I Know Your Steps)
Memorable lyrics: “Will You give me reason to live ‘Cause I’m dying…”
Three words: woman on piano. That’s about all we can say about this bland ballad sung by yet another woman from the Balkans. Remembering Romania’s 2009 entry, we thought that “Balkan girls like to party like nobody.” Apparently Nina Badric missed the memo.
Prediction: 12 Wiwi Jury: 16 ESC Press Poll: 17 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 5
18. Lithuania: Donny Montell with “Love is Blind”
Memorable lyrics: “Love is blind it’s true, nobody is like you.”
A one-handed cartwheel is a pretty original way to signpost the tempo change of a song. But will a cute face and a black blindfold be enough to convince voters to support this youngster? This number was definitely written by someone who hit his prime when Donny Montell was still in the womb. But middle-aged voters may love this 90’s style pop. To Donny’s credit, his vocals are on point throughout, and he knows how to move around in the dark like no other. And he also knows how to flirt with cameramen, as illustrated in our recent interview in Amsterdam.
Prediction: 15 Wiwi Jury: 12 ESC Press Poll: 10 Wiwibloggs Fan Poll: 16
Hey Wiwi, just to let you know you mixed up Bosnia & Croatia. Bosnia’s singer is Maya Star and Croatia is Nina Badric, not the other way around. Thanks!
GO MALTA GO KURT U CAN DO IT U DESERVES THE FINAL :}